Turning 41 and I'm Not Done!

I get more excited about birthdays than New Year's Eve. It marks a new starting line and I look forward to enjoying every step—well at least those steps I want to linger as I celebrate my 5th year of running.

It didn't take me long to come up with the title of this post. In the past year I "Rocked40" with many firsts of awesomeness, including these 8:

1) Cranked out my first sub-2-hour half where I thought I was going to burst and just kept on pushing

(I promised myself during that race that I wouldn't demand this sub-2-hour pace again this year.)

2) Set another PR for my full marathon, and finished with more in the tank while happily crossing the line with my best run buddy.

3) Pushed another PR in the half marathon. (I lied about that never again. You should know me better Jill.) 

4) Joined my husband in his first race—a hot 15k.

5) Had an epic event of rocking my first 50 mile ultra and finished a few minutes from second in my age group. Loved every second of that journey and have no regrets for the photo stops—pure joy.

6) Ran RAGNAR D.C. on Team Sarah—BadAss Mother Runners. Met an amazing group of women that continue to inspire, encourage and support.

7) Had amazing and challenging core workouts and long training runs all summer with my best run buddy heading to our first big one—50 mile trail ultra.

8) Ran with my husband in his first half marathon.

There are two words that sum up last year, and I carried them as my mantra in training and spirit. They are Relentless Faith. 

I am adding one word to that this year that came from another mother Ragnar runner when I was spinning around in my head with the Chronic, Exertional Compartment Syndrome verdict. She wrote: "You are going to get through this, because you have some fierce determination..."

I believe that sometimes we just need the slightest nudge from others to correct our flight. This is the mantra and fake tattoo to set the tone for this year's challenges. I have wings!…and wait until you see the one I made my run buddy for her 35th birthday.

Time to Fly 

I am letting Rock40 be the kick-off of this decade where I prove to myself again and again just how high I can go. One time just isn't enough. Truth: I'm always going to want more. But let's keep it simple for this year's expectations:

1) Set 3 PRs—one for each event half, full and ultra

2) Run 2-3 ultras (50k, 50 mile and 100k)

3) Drop the hammer in one 5k since I have never raced one

Shaking it up and tuning it up

Hill repeats: 1x a week. Usually on Mondays, I run the repeats to keep them away from my long weekend runs. They are draining and did I mention I am over 40?! I have to watch ganging the intensity workouts too close together. They are still my "beat me down and make me strong" favorite and hardest training tool. I started this three months earlier this year. I am currently at 20. Because of the record snowfalls, the treadmill is where this amazing event takes place. Amazing, because I haven't crashed yet or called 911. 

The Workout:

Incline the treadmill to 15% and run 0.10 at a level 4. Then decrease to 0% incline for 0.10 at the same pace and repeat. 5 repeats will take 15 minutes–1 hour for 20 with 4 miles covered. It is difficult and some times excruciating. Completely worth it to build power, cardio and a faster recovery. I am keeping a calendar and actually counting the miles this year. When all this snow melts I am looking forward to counting the accent outside–it's entertaining in a nerdy runner way!

155 Push-ups: 6x a week. This is all new this year! Why? The answer is core and upper body strength to power up hills. 

T25 Beta: 2x a week. It isn't as time nor physically demanding as Insanity, but still pushes me in core, cardio and strength. It's enough challenge and variety to keep me interested and happy at the moment. I am very busy as a mother, wife and designer. Getting the time isn't easy, but just hit play. I had been doing this 3x a week, but 2 times is fitting in better. I may be switching back to Insanity come May.

Train Like a Mother Own It Plan: I have followed this before and it doesn't get old for me. I dig the different challenges day to day of interval, zones, negative splits, hilly vs easy runs, mileage, etc. Plus it will roll into the ultra training plan with ease come May. There are many days that I think, "How am I going to do this today?" But I do. It is also useful to have a run buddy on the same plan to discuss and keep it honest with. You can do this!

Diet: I don't talk about diet very much. But it has been a hot bottom for me. I would really like to drop 10lbs -15lbs and am focussing more on food being fuel and what is healthy to building muscle, hydrate and become usable energy. Not to say that I don't sample the yummy baked goods I make. But I am trying to have some extra control and not keep sampling. Also, skipping and cutting sugary snacks and replacing them with fruit, lots of salads and less dark meat. Here is a diet aid that helps at night...drink water or just go to bed.

With my first challenge to PR quickly approaching, it's time to focus and drive.

A Very Cherry Winter…

I am a runner. Stopping is like sucking the air from my lungs. It is my compass and the place I center. The place where I believe during that runner's high that all great things are possible. I can always do more and be more within the miles and I come back refreshed and grateful. I need to feel that limitless faith like a child.

So when a new verdict came in from an orthopedic surgeon of Chronic Exertional Compartment Syndrome (CRCS), I just kept resting my forehead on my hand and breathing deeply. It is exactly what I thought it was three months ago with my vast internet searching. It is rare, but all my symptoms fit. I am sure it annoys many doctors that so many of us runners self diagnose, but that's the world we live in. To them I say, "get use to it and start opening your mind." We love information. I was told in October by a physician's assistant and doctor, that it certainly was not the case and dismissed and told it was a sprain muscle from over use—not the case at all. Sprains heal or get better with rest. I had already been resting it. I had had this coming on since mid July and the pain was there within 20 minutes of exercise.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

These are the symptoms I have had on the outside of my lower, left leg:

Tightness » burning like bacon grease » pain that increases on the outside and moves deeper in the calf =  finally needing to walk a little to release it and stop the pain and start up the cycle again when resuming the run

This has been a roller coaster that I want OFF from.

As defined by the Mayo Clinic, CRCS  is an exercise-induced muscle and nerve condition that causes pain, swelling and sometimes even disability in affected muscles of your legs or arms.

I know some people will think "why not do the surgery and get it over with?" But I want this next year to be a worthwhile running journey and 6-weeks off will hinder that. I think, why not try everything non-invasive first. Being cut should be my last resort. I asked around my BAMRR network (those speedy ladies I ran with at Ragnar DC) and found another runner who had the surgery. Her details made me more determined to put it off as long as possible or at least until the fall if I had to have it done. 

I also received a message from a sport medicine doctor who thought Graston Technique along with myofascial release and neuro unwinding would be helpful. Acupuncture was suggested as well. So with that support, I don't feel like I am off my rocker.

I am not a doctor and am not pretending to be one. But this is my time on this earth and I think people run too fast to surgery and end up with more issues. I may be spinning my wheels in the long run, but putting it off is worth it for me. Reaching out to others has helped me make more insightful decisions.

CRCS would mean surgery with 6 weeks recovery with no running and I was just about to start my marathon training schedule. I asked about alternatives suggesting some like Graston Technique and Acupuncture, and he told me nothing else was scientifically proven. 

The next step would be having the pressure test done on my leg after running on a treadmill in their office with the pain setting it. To perform the test, imagine a big, long, think needle and my leg as a tire getting each compartment tested with the needle inserted. OUCH! I have not done this to date since I have no intension of rushing to surgery. I needed time to research a little more and try at least something.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

So what am I doing and what has happened in the last three weeks?

Many runners do all sorts of little tweaks to run fast, more efficient, and in my case trying to run pain and ache free. These are a few things I have focused on more in the last three weeks.

• Back to training with no running the day before the long run—just a smaller workout allowed like T25.

• I had custom orthotics made for my shoes and always run in them (been wearing these for 2 months).

• Switching shoes out when I feel an ache: I have switched to my Saucony Stability shoes on some runs outside because I can feel them pushing my pronating feet out further than the Hokas. Sometimes I feel like I need it. But the Sauconys feel too firm and even hurt on the treadmill. I still love the absorption of impact with the Hokas and ran 14 miles with them last weekend. 

• Foam rolling just about every night (been rolling for 2 months).

• Most importantly, I have been pounding the CherryFlex. 1 large tablespoon of the gel from the jar taken twice a day. I don't miss a dose. Although I have used CherryFlex for post exercise benefits, I thought that this would be a worth while effort and I could put it to my own test at a high dose. If it can make horses feel like running again, why not me?

Week one: After building up the CherryFlex for 8 days I noticed a big difference of some soreness and aches instead of the pain that had started in the first two miles and stopped me mid-run before. 

Week two: I was having some completely ache-free runs and others with just a slight ache.

Week three: I have just completed the second week of marathon training (week three with CherryFlex) and have not been backing off from the intensity these last three weeks. I have been pain-free ALL week. It's an astonishing turn of events and I am looking forward to this progression and training season. I still get a strange ache now and then, but nothing to make me come to a stop. That 8 minutes mile just may be within my reach afterall without the pain that has been blocking progress since October. I am doing speed work with the "Own It Plan." This marathon training is on!

Just to illustrate the stress of my training plan, this is what it looked like last week:

For years people have been benefiting by consuming tart cherries or CherryFlex for their high antioxidants to prevent gout flare ups, arthritis inflammation and pain, and reduce muscle soreness following exercise. Other claims on cherries include the promotion of cardiovascular health and providing treatment other than some medications, and even help treat insomnia (because of they contain melatonin). There are plenty of articles online to support these claims on cherries. Believe me, I have been searching! One article by the Huff Post suggested they even aid in the loss of belly fat. Dr. Oz has featured the benefits of tart cherries juice on his show. As far as me experiencing these extra effects, I am dreaming more and remembering my dreams.That is a little strange in its self. I didn't realize that I dreamed of races (and getting lost) and my family so much.

Enjoy my photo of CherryFlex in the snow
because we have a lot of both at our
home in Michigan.

What is CherryFlex? It's just tart cherries including the pulp and skin in a thick paste consistency. I put it on my oatmeal or eat it off the spoon. It's sweet and a little sour just like ripe tart cherries. And, my daughter begs for a taste every time I open it.

Here are the 3 ingredients: Tart Cherry paste, tart cherry concentrate, glycerin

As I stated before, I am not a doctor and this is my personal experience and thoughts. I am not getting paid to write about this journey. I am ecstatic with the results so far and optimistic about 2014. Who knows, maybe it will even help someone else.
  
If you are interested in trying this, you may order CherryFlex through, email  orders@cherryflex.com

Change of Plan

Finish Line!

I am not a super human. I clearly spent all my mental toughness and physical speed the week before at Ragnar DC. I wouldn't change a thing about that.

Not every race is going to be a PR and filled with awesome self accomplishment. I was so looking forward to running in the Traverse City Lighthouse Half Marathon with my run buddy, Evie and my husband—helping them break 2 hours or come close to it. However, I had my doubts of being able to hold a 9-minute pace going into this. I had been tired all week to say the least. Recovery is tough after Ragnar with early plane flight thrown in.

Arriving in the dark at 6 a.m. to ensure we didn't miss our bus to the start line, we threw on our warmer clothes to discard right before the race. I have a special bag of frumpy fat clothes and maternity wear just for this occasion.  Items are picked-up and donated, so this makes sense and we don't have to lug them around.

Waiting at the Lighthouse in our toss-it coverups.

But this Lighthouse run sucketh for the first 5 miles with poor breathing, tightening in my chest

My funny run buddy on the bus behind us:
Scrunchy Face!

and my left leg extremely aching for the first 3 miles until I drowned it out of my head. Then it just kept crying anyways. The course was hilly with a few miles of two-track and I just couldn't muster up the speed. My run buddy later pointed out that the date on my shoes was her birthday in June. DANG-it! I just ran in over-the-hill shoes. What a stupid mistake.

After mile 6, I said forget it! This just wasn't fun at all. I turned off my tunes, started talking more and changed the plan. Evie wasn't lov'n this run either and was coming off of being sick the previous week. We stopped pushing and started enjoying the views and journey more.

At mile 11, my husband realized that these two ladies were holding him back with their chatter and he took off to finish 5 minutes ahead of us. He later said he felt like he had nothing left in that last half mile to the finish line. Hmmm, too much speed at once.

Evie and I finished at 2:14. It is what it is and my leg was grateful to be done.

My husband is already sign-up for his next half at Bay Shore to break 2 hours. Totally doable since he trains faster than I do.


Post Race Assessment:
What I have gone through since is a series of painful leg episodes extending to a burning under my knee. I have completely stop cross training and took some time off of running hoping it would heal. After xrays, a doctor said is was a sprain. That was two months ago.

I had shoe orthotics made and have been foam rolling, stretching and strength training with one leg squats but need to add to that. Lots of pushups being done to build upper body. But without a lot of cardio, I think I may have a hard climb this year.

I am just starting in with low miles right now and still get that strained ache and pain. The treadmill seems to be a little better. I miss my run buddy. We have had (2) 5-8 mile runs in the last two months. Come back 41 sounds too negative. I need to position this as a positive in some form. Maybe 41 and and gonna run.

I may still go in for an MRI and PT.  I have even thought that it could be a nerve issue. Maybe a Chiropractor is needed? I just don't feel like me without my constant fitness drive. An 8 minute mile looks more like a dream right now.

All of my drive has been poured into work in the last couple months … hey, didn't I once say that was kryptonite?! Yes, weight gain has happened. Time to Focus. Drive. And get this leg hell taken care of.

Ragnar Relay: BadAss Mother Runners

What a ride this life can be when first you practice to run free.

Being on Team Sarah was both a privilege and a highlight to my running hobby and completed my Rock40 running party. 

Taking the trip to Washington DC was a leap out of my comfort zone. I have not traveled alone in about 17 years and trips with the family are but once a year for this country mouse. I hate traffic! I am use to two lanes on a road, and I may see 5 cars on a 10 mile run. It's just the way I like it, but for a grand adventure this mouse needed to leave the house.

After all the careful planning through Facebook with the Ragnar group and one amazing AMR assistant, Kristen, I felt comfortable in this journey. My itinerary was planned from my 6 a.m. departure from a nearby airport on Thursday, to my 6 a.m. departure from D.C. on Sunday morning. I was hoping to get just a few hours sleep on Saturday night because we had no idea when we would finish. 

I packed light with two carry-ons stuffed with Ragnar safety essentials like a night vest and headlamp, as well as the wealth of sponsor gifts we each received: the BAMRR (BadAss Mother Ragnar Runner) shirt, BAMR shirt (Team Sarah's name), 110% Socks, Ultimate Direction water bottle, Saucony shirt, capri and shoes. We also had received Nuttzo (which is long gone and I have purchased 7 more since) NUUN, Calms Forte and Skinfare.

In the bottom of my bag I flattened 24 pink pom-poms to cheer on our teammates and other teams. Some day I am going to run with pom poms. It wouldn't be this run, but just you wait. I am laying it on the table. I can't believe my bag fit under the seat, let alone that it even zipped, but it did! See, I really don't travel enough.

Upon arrival in D.C. at 9:00 a.m. I was eating my first 5-Guys burger and fresh cut fries as recommended by the Dulless airport information guy. I made that burger look so good that more people flocked the joint creating a line, and one lady said after she saw me there, that it looked too good to pass up. Was I moaning out loud? Sorry about that.

I proceeded to the lower level where we were meeting for our van pick-up with Dimity to drive to Cumberland, Maryland. We had to back-track to the start of the race which was ending in D.C. I had worn my Sole Sister shirt to be recognized and a really sweet mama named Janelle approached me in her AMR shirt and giant suite case and bag (um-maybe I under packed a little). We chatted for an hour or so and although she has lived about everywhere in the USA, she currently lives in Texas. I have to say, I don't know why she doesn't get told all the time that she looks like Kelly Clarkston.

We then caught up with a few more teammates as we waited. The excitement rose again when Dimity arrived. Woop woop! Here we go. 

The instant comradery surprised me. I thought it would be there as it was already online and in facebook. But the real thing FEELS amazing. I have never met so many people at once that I could instantly connect with. We just clicked and it felt like distance was the only thing that had separated this sisterhood. I had told my husband back in May that I really had a few things already in common with these ladies and that they really were not strangers at all. I was glad I was right. The adventures of Renee and Lorraine cracked me up on the van ride and thru dinner. These two friends know how to have a great time. My cheeks hurt from the cackling.

So many of these ladies came with the sweetest gifts created from their talents. Nicole from Team Dimity is an amazing quilter and gave us each a Ragnar personalized zip bag. Rebecca brought customized cookies for each of us. She is an Architect and these cookies are just something she does for fun. We have spent months talking about eating her cookies. Aimee brought a CD recently released with her singing talents. Terri brought BAMRR stickers she created to stand the test of time—meaning once they stick they are not coming off. Bethany shared a copy of a book, I Just Want to Pee Alone, that she is published in for her humorous, raw but articulate, honest views of motherhood. Check out her blog at http://bethanymeyer.com. I know she makes me feel much more sane.

Food Glorious Food
In a cookie monster voice..."Me like to eat things!" Put 24 mother runners together and we have one big slumber party. After we each ate a family sized dinner … I mean dinner served in family style with large portions passed around, we went for some frozen custard. I will be thinking about that chocolate malt with lust for years to come. Many food stops were made during the race even though our vans we stocked. Must have coffee and Chipotle!

The Race Details

Meeting back in Dimity's room we went through a quick debriefing on how Ragnar is ran and what to expect in the next 45 hours. I hadn't known that the team of 12 really becomes a team of 6 since the vans split, and I would only see the other half of the team at the 3 major exchanges—after all 6 of van one ran their leg. Luckily, I had a great, open-minded, supportive, funny and fabulous group of runners to be in a van with for 30+ hours. We beat the same jokes non-stop. 

Completely open minded and looking forward to running one badass hill that really did seem to go on forever. My roomie and van mate, Nicole, and I had discussed running Ragnar as an ultra race some time. Which sounds really great BEFORE the hill. During it how ever, I felt like that was the dumbest idea ever, HA!

I didn’t know how I would keep the expected pace on this one. I felt like I was running stupid, but how else would I make it up the climb in a decent time if I didn't run it. I went a little off course adding .40 miles to my total, but zipped back to take two kills on this endless climb. Both of those people broke into a walk after a long climb together with the guy outlasting the other woman. I just kept talking myself up in my head. "Gonna walk? Hell no! I'm an ultra runner. And...with my luck my team will drive by if I dare walk right now."  It was the battle I was looking for that went on through steep gravel hills that turned to thick dust as vans went by, and where I found my mojo and the right moments to strut a fast climbing walk.  

Then I found the downhill moments to make up time. The declines went fast and had many sharper uneven rocks. All I could think of was that someone is going to get hurt here today. 

As I approached the team doing a little dance, I started yelling, “where is she?” Sarah was busy and not in sight. I later heard she may have been serenading another van. Oh well, she seemed to have popped out of no where just when I hit the exchange. She wasn't quite ready but hit the ground running. I was 7 minutes under the predicted time. My reward was the extra metal belt buckle for taking the hardest leg of the race. And more importantly, that man I had battled on the uphill pavement came up to say good job and high five me, and tell me he had been trying to catch me the entire time since I passed him.

Okay, Ultra Ragnar is sounding pretty good again. Who’s with me?

Just a little disclaimer before you think the rest of this course is flat. Everyone will have some hills and get a beatdown. The total mileage for each person on a 12 person team is 13.4 to 21.9 miles. Train, and you will be just fine.

The rest of the race went flawlessly for the most part and was just one grand adventure of laughing and women keeping it light. Sarah was showered with fans … even to the point of being recognized in the community shower … naked. I took my spot further away and at least could turn away to silently laugh in my corner. It takes a certain kind of guts I just don't have or want to have to approach someone in the shower… naked. I wouldn't walk up to anyone in the shower and have a conversion with them. Hats and clothes off to this woman.

My final leg I had the best 3.4 miles of my life. I pushed thru the heat, humidity and had 2 complete stops at lights with narrowly escaping being hit by a car not stopping. I will remember that Corvette front end for a long time. 

Never running a 5k before, I just didn't want to let go of any speed when I didn't have a light. Plus, I came to pour it on. I past 4 people who looked like they were ready to croak. I was elated after seeing that I did it in 27 minutes and had one mile in there of 8:03. Now that deserves a pompom. 

3 Things I learned and should have known better:

1) Always pack a shirt and pair of shorts for each leg and another shirt for in-between legs
2) Pack a towel (you never know when you may get  to shower)
3) I should not be the one driving at night—do not allow hanging clothing over a mirror that you need to see out of while driving. Holy shit batman. Sorry ladies.
Bonus: Have a strong navigator like Terri. Or, getting lost could be fun too.

On a final note, if you ever have an opportunity to run a Ragnar relay with 6-24 strangers or enter a contest to run with Another Mother Runner … DO IT! Don't walk—RUN to register. These races are designed for any running level, granted you are actually a runner. Keep an open mind and stress free, and you will have the makings for a great experience. Don't be surprised when you feel like your universe has changed and that there was nothing else before Ragnar, except when you call home to check of your husband and kids. Live in the moment. There is already a BAMR Ragnar reunion planned for some of these ladies. I will be running a marathon at that time. So that takes me out of that mix.

Below are some of my favorite highlights in photos. Sorry, no shower photos here.

Check out this video for a glimpse of the 2013 Ragnar DC Relay Mother Runner Showdown 

set to an original song by Aimee Hoyt.

The Ultra Ultimate 50 Miler Trail Run: North Country Trail Run 2013

My world in motion as taken by my 5 year old right after 50 miles. No it isn't glamorous, but it's real.

My heart went boom, Boom, BOOM…

It's probably going to take me several attempts to write about this 50 Mile Ultra experience. Forgive me of my sappiness, but I don't think I will ever think of a race event the same way or measure one up to the standards of where my heart and mind met on the course of 50 miles.

If you had told 4 years ago when I started running, that I would run a marathon, I would have thought you were out of your mind. Each step changed me day by day. If you would have also told me that one day I would run a 50mile Trail Ultra, I would have thought you needed a good psychiatrist immediately.

I started training 9 months ago and had been waiting for the day to hit that trail race and touch down on my dream. While many people just thought it was nuts and had negative opinions and stated questions of, "Who would want to do that?!" or "How are YOU going to do that in under 14 hours?", I grew more and more in love with the coming adventure with each hard workout, long run, and with each review of ultra runner blogs, videos and interviews. The build up was huge, and it delivered everything and more than I imagined. I am fortunate to have a kindred spirit in my run buddy that shares my passion. Definitely divine intervention there.

That's a lot of gear! Drop box ready and everything else I carried.
I ended up not needing my box

I prepped my gear a week ahead, I didn't really feel that nervous. I just wanted this day to come. The major tapering was awkward. The night before the race I could not sleep. For the first time ever, I had insomnia. I slept 1 hour. I wish I was kidding. I decided that this lack of sleep thing should be ignored. Being a mother, wife and business owner, I have ran many great runs on 3-4 hours sleep. What's a couple less?

Come hell or high-water, I am an Ultra Runner. And my tunes were ready to go—one ear in and one ear listening to the trail and other runners.

As we set off on our first loop of a two loop course, we kept tight with mid-back of the pack runners. Nothing would be sillier than going out too fast before that second half of the loop with the steep hills. I followed everything that I had been told and read about ultra running. Walk the hills—every hill. Walk it with purpose. I was walking up smaller hills while others were running at the same speed. Yeah! That worked!

I took advantage of the down hill runs.We just wanted to finish under the 14 hour mark before the course was swept. Yes, were were worried about that since the book Relentlessly Forward Progress predicted a 50 mile trail time of 13+ hours. That isn't much wiggle room for aid station and any issue on this course with hills, roots, rocks and a narrow path. The down hill was crucial in gaining time. I found myself exhilerated on the down hill and digging into the uphill with ease. All those hill repeats and core training were empowering me this day. I went into these hills waiting for the pain and expecting it to rise up and rip me. My run buddy asked me about any pain about mile 20. I had nothing but typical aches. Injury pain in the past had made any aches feel like nothing. It just may have felt that way since we were on trail and not pavement—a bonus I accepted.

Aid stations were stocked with sandwiches (PB&J and grilled cheese), GU, fresh fruit, noodle soup and drinks. I even had coke for the first time in maybe years. Delicious. Literally running from one buffet to the next keeps the mind and palette happy. My buddy's parents and sister were at more that half of the aid stations to cheer and assist us. Really, an amazing crew. I didn't know about the rewards of a cold shammy on my neck until then—see still learning things.

I was talking with several lady runners and had to let them go to wait for my run buddy. They were going for 10:30 time and I thought that was out of reach for me anyways. I let the same people go by a couple times while I waited for my run buddy. I even tried to take a few photos and should have taken more. We were making pretty good time regardless and I just wanted to enjoy the forest and the run.

The view at mile 24.

It felt like we were heading into different fairylands worlds with the trees, bushes, color and lighting completely changing as we went. One area even looked like a hazy fog. The beautiful moments assisted in letting the time and miles tick by. I also used my run to pray gratitude for the moment, journey and faith. At mile 24 there was a steep sandy climb for a breathtaking view. Photo time—we asked one of the Marathon runners to snap some photos of us. That's right, she was not in a hurry and I had been talking to her on some of the trail. Thank you kind runner.

First loop done at about 5:40. Shazam! We are in this and just needed to bring it home on the second loop.

My buddy had a pacer step in at mile 26 and I found myself still pulling ahead. My quads started to ache a lot more about mile 27. I knew what may be coming so I kept them moving and pulled away further and then I didn't see them anymore. The pain hurt less as long as I kept swiftly moving and biting into it one step at a time—well, it felt more swift in my world at that moment. I didn't just stand at any more aid stations to prevent my legs from freezing up. I ate and kept moving my legs. I probably looked like I was doing a pee pee dance.

"Faith over fear, faith over fear." echoed in my thoughts. I had to have faith that I could keep this pace and ignore the quad banging pain. I thought of an Another Mother Runner podcast that they read part of the book by Katherine Switzer, where she said this statement before crushing the marathon course when women were deamed as being too WEAK to run marathons. She said, "I am going to run the HELL out of this race," and she did. My game changed and I decided to see what I could do in this race on this day—what faith could do. Just keep eating and drinking to avoid a real wall and run the hell out of 20 plus miles.

I was surprised that some people didn't even carry a water bottle. I can not imagine doing that. One young man was struggling getting station to station to hydrate. I filled my Camelbak three times and drank the cups of liquid joy at each aid station.

I didn't see many people on the trail on this second loop, but when I did I either respectfully paced behind them a bit or swiftly passed if they just were not moving the same speed. Most often we would look at each other and say "good job."People wer dragging limbs a little more and looking like they were doing the ultra-shuffle. I told two struggling woman on the half course that they were doing awesome, because I ran that course last year and it's a beast.

I started passing people I had seen earlier in the day and even the same two ladies I had been talking to with the 10:30 goal. That was a surprise. I guess keeping it cool that first loop paid-off, and I honestly don't know what came over me to just keep moving. Interestingly, my breathing changed. I am a mouth breather and I have asthma, but switched to breathing in through my nose and out through my mouth. OMG! It was the Scott Jurek 's Breath of Fire. I have never been able to do this but is was working efficiently and naturally.

In the last three miles I stopped at the aid station for some fruit and more coke, and gave the volunteer a "hallelujah!" when he told me there were three more miles. I finally caught up to two 30 something year old guys that I hadn't seen since mile 10. They were surprised to see me and the stunned looks on their faces … priceless. To keep my mojo going I took off again in front of them while they were still eating. Beat the boys was on my mind. I just couldn't help myself. Yep, that girl was here today.

On the steep hill before the last aid station (one mile to go), I took my one and only flying dirt nap. My time had come! It was like sliding down hill into home plate. I scooped black dirt into my bra and shirt and the dirt was stuck to my entire sweaty body like a mud mask. It hurt, but I had no time to assess the damage or even notice the big gouge in my finger from my wedding ring. My right hand throbbed, but it wasn't like a broken finger was going to stop me now. I jumped backed up because I could not let the boys pass me. I kept hearing their voices in the woods. Or maybe I was hearing things. HA!

Last mile: On the last hill incline to the viewing area I heard the two boys coming behind me as I reach the top of the hill. No time for photos now. It was on, and all I had to do was execute the last long hill down and get to the finish line. No falling, go hard, and do it one more time so there was no way they could catch me.  I ran as fast as I could down and around the corner and then down again to the flat area with all the speed I had. I passed one more guy casually coming in. I had joy the entire way and the crowd screaming (what was left at this point) just made me go faster. My husband and the crew jumped up as I was running by. Later my husband said he didn't think it was me coming because I was running too fast and I don't run that fast. Humph. Kind of funny, because race day is the only day I put it all out there and quite honestly... I don't know why I could run that fast at the end of 50 miles either. A group of college kids were at the finish line to hoot, holler, and high-five the runners in. I leaped threw the finish like there were flames. Touch down on an Ultra dream! Not the X jump I had wanted but I never really practiced that either.

I finished my first 50 Ultra in 11:17. 5th in my age and only separated by 11 minutes from the second place runner. That's close for a 50 miler in my opinion and I couldn't be more pleased.

A little later in the food line one of those male runners I had past in the last three miles told me that they had seen me throughout the day, and when I past it kind of ticked him off. Then he justified it by saying it was his first Ultra. Well, me too buddy and it took me 22 miles to catch you. I earned it! I was actually a little caught off guard by his statement. I would have liked to have said something like, "You got chiced by a 40 year old mama," but I will save that for a shirt.

Right after Evie Ultra finishes.

I finished almost a full hour ahead of my buddy who also slaughtered the time cut-off by an hour and a half. I was there to see her come through the finish line and own her dream. What an honor and it was an emotional moment for both of us.

It was surreal that I never hit a mental low point. This was the day I was waiting for and trained for with anticipation—with a celebration run and completely focused. It was just my day to drive. YES!

Finished with Heart just like the medal states.
And every day we train with heart as well. Blessed am I.

My Ultra loves.

Mental Gear

As I start to get ready for the North Country Ultra 50, I am packing gear and thinking about all the things I may need and cross-checking with various lists for reference.

I also am loading my mind with what I think I may need as mental fuel and the exact thoughts I may need to pull up WHEN I struggle. It's going to be a bear, so I can not go into this with an empty mind.

Middle: My Grandmother Ruth laughing
with relatives. Her loving spirit was passed on
thru my mother. 

Mental Gear 1
I don't fall into the mindset of running a race for someone else.That always sounds silly to me since I can't make the connecting to how my run will help them unless it is for a charity or raising awareness for an actual cause by wearing a shirt or something. Plus, running is a personal experience for me pulling inner strength. It's like saying "run this for Charlie." Just sounds funny to me. Although, moments of strength can be pulled out from powerful thoughts, and the power of others. That I do know about. I make some sort of connection and I can push harder. One thought that has lingered around is in the most unlikely of places. I think of my grandmother that I never met. She died of cancer when my mother was 14. How incredably painful it must have been for my mother at 14. She has not talked much about this until recently, and I have to say it brings me to tears. Not only because I am a mother and can't imagine how hard that would have been to leave my children, but because of how hard my children would grieve a life time. Strange enough, is that my mother was just saying the other day that "we get over things and move on" and then she had a break down when she found her own lump in her breast. She thought of her mother and grieved again. Luckily, my mother's lump was not cancer.

I don't think we do get over all things and events and I don't think we are suppose to. Part of us never does move on when our world is pulled from beneath us. Years can pass and then there we are stumbling on a root and we remember like it was last week or last month. And so I know that one thought will be included on the trail: If my mother can loose her mother at 14 and deal with all that pain, then I can certainly run 50 miles on a trail. If my grandmother can hold on for two years and loose everything that mattered, I can certainly run 50 miles on a trail.

Mental Gear 2
Another heavily relied on aid will be my music. With one ear tuned-in to my ipod and one with nature, I will be pumping my head with 9 hours of power music and listening to what anyone has to say on the trail, especially Evie Ultra. I will just have to reshuffle when the tunes run out. That's all I have time for. Over the last few months I have played many songs over and over that pick me up and kick me in the can, and I feel like a warrior at moments. I just hope I have many of those moments this Saturday. Oh, my not so good friend, Fear just stopped by.

I have replayed a few beats many times in hill repeats Including Grace Potter & the Nocturnals: The Lion, The Beast, The Beat and Orianthi: You Don't Wanna Know. Check them out, because these women rock.

A few others chic power tunes from my 9 hour mix include:

Katy Perry: Roar

Natalie Kills: Brake You Hard

Ellie Goulding: Burn

Krewella: Alive

Krewella: Come & Get It

Kellie Pickler: Tough

Off to pack up my Focused Drive of taking on a 50mile Ultra. I have been looking forward to this day for 9 months...time to birth this mother. 

Fueled

You ever have one of those days that you really need a workout because somebody was so mean or nasty to you? Or maybe something is in the news that is so disturbing, you just can't shake it? I have had many fastest runs fueled by hurt, anger and my own mental trap. Today I really need a hard run, but unlucky for me I already ran and am in a taper or I would run again!

Although the run doesn't solve the issue, it sure wears me out to where I can stop thinking about it,  release some tension, or maybe make the issue seem like not such an issue anymore. Hitting a new PR doesn't hurt either.

Recovery is literally just over that hill, but not today.